


Persona 5 Oneshots

by AkiHeMan_Sanada



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2018-07-07
Packaged: 2019-06-05 14:56:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15173141
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AkiHeMan_Sanada/pseuds/AkiHeMan_Sanada
Summary: I have too many, WAY too many AUs/concepts for the Persona series, especially Persona 5, so this is a uhhhhh BIG FAT DUMP of oneshots that feature AUs and concepts that I thought of originally, but may already be a thing. There's fluff, angst, hot stuff (potentially) and all that jazz. Like I said, this is kind of like a big dump of ideas I have that are morphed into oneshots. Who knows, some of these may turn out to be an actual fic ;3





	1. Introduction/A Test...?

**Author's Note:**

> This is just an intro. I'm still figuring out AO3 and how publishing and writing works work, so bare with me.

Hello, hi, yes, welcome!

A brief introduction:

This is my very first work. The main purpose of this introduction is for me to figure some things out regarding publishing and writing with AO3.

I do not own any of the characters from the Persona 5 series. All are credited to Atlus. Plots used in this could also belong to Atlus or be created by me.

This is a mish-mash of a bunch of ideas that I have for Persona 5, but don't have the time to start/have the ideas fully developed yet. Some of these can and will continue into a real, big, actual fanfic, while others, most likely most of them, will remain as oneshots here.

Obviously, I don't own the Persona series, its plot, or any of its characters, so that's free to your use. However, if there is a crossover or specific context I myself created/used, please let me know if you plan using it. In other words, don't use MY specific ideas without permission/letting me know. Contact me if you want to use one of my ideas/AUs/plots/concepts!

(What I mean by that is if there is a plot idea on here that I started but never turned into a full fanfic, you can take it, but please let me know :3)

Other than that, I think we can get started! This is a medley of fluff, angst, new AUs, new concepts, some hot stuff if ya know what I'm saying, and more. Hopefully, you find some enjoyment from this :3

Regards,

AkiHeMan_Sanada


	2. "Android!Ryuji/Human!Ann: Detroit Become Human x Persona 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I do not own any characters, the series, or plotlines from Persona 5 and Detroit Become Human. Also Android!Ryuji reminds me of Connor, the most precious bb out there ya get

Ann Takamaki was alone at home, again.

Her parents were off around the world, promoting fashion and what not. She never minded their absence in her life, but she'll never deny that sometimes, it did get quite lonely for her.

She was watching TV in her living room, melting into her couch, absolutely bored out of her mind. She never had that many friends, and after Shiho... left, she often found herself moping around her home or Shibuya all by herself. Sometimes she would hang out with Ren, but he was so busy. She never knew what he was up to doing, but she never bothered to ask anyway. Who was she to be able to go about, nosing into people's business?

She yawned when the doorbell rang. She frowned. It was that new caretaker that her parents had hired. Ann was absolutely NOT pleased with that. She was told that this caretaker would be around more often than her previous one. She admitted she was lonely, but a caretaker isn't exactly what she was looking for when she said she wished she had more company.

She stretched as she proceeded to the door, frowning. She unlocked the door and turned the knob, opening it. The sunlight filtered into the house, and Ann flinched. When she opened her eyes, what she saw was DEFINITELY NOT what she expected.

Standing before her was an android. She frowned. She heard these things were hella controversial; there were some who exclaimed how helpful they were, and some who criticized them as "plastic pricks" until their last breath. As she studied the android, she wasn't expecting it to be so... life-like.

The android stood before her, although it's posture wasn't as stiff and solid as the ones she saw around the city. It slumped a bit, hands in its pockets, almost as if it were absolutely carefree. The android's skin was a little tanner than hers, and his hair, which seemed to use to be nice and orderly, was ruffled slightly, sticking up in short, small spikes. She frowned.

Was it a defect...?

The android spoke in some kind of angsty, teen voice. It sounded, and behaved, like some kind of annoying brat.

"Hey, my name's Ryuji. Nice to meet you."

Ann studied the android. She didn't know if she was annoyed, confused, surprised, or all three at once. She awkwardly waved back.

"Um... hi. Are you...?"

"Ryuji? Yes, I am Ryuji. Sent to you from CyberLife. Nice to meet-"

"No, no, not that. I meant, are you the android sent here by...?"

"I wasn't really sent here by transportation. Unless you count walking. I walked here."

For an intelligent android, Ryuji was certainly not that... intelligent.

It hit Ann that there were certain models for androids or some sort like that. If she remembered, they had androids programmed for all sorts of things... children, maids, detectives, all sorts of roles that before, only humans could fulfill.

"Um, what... what, "model," are you?" She hoped she had used the right term. It seemed Ryuji took everything literally, so she really didn't know what he would answer.

"Uh, model CK500. Do you want to know my serial?"

"I think I'll pass."

"Phew! That's good. I forgot."

"You what?!"

Ryuji frowned. "I can always check my program to remember. It's fine."

Ann sighed. God, this thing really might be a defect.

"Ryuji... what exactly is... um... model CK... whatever. What is YOUR purpose...?"

Ryuji seemed startled by that question. "What is MY purpose?"

Ann realized that that was a very deep question that even humans struggled with. She hoped she didn't fry his circuits by making him think too hard.

"Well, no, I mean, yes, but-"

Ryuji grinned. "My purpose is to be your friend."

Ann took a step back in disbelief. "Be my... be my friend?!"

Ryuji nodded. "Yeah! I'm the effin' best!"

Ann face palmed herself. She SERIOUSLY needed to confront her parents about this.

Ann looked him in the eye, in the plastic android eye. "Ryuji, I was told I was going to receive a caretaker. Are you sure you didn't stumble at the wrong house...?"

Ryuji looked at her curiously. "Uh, I'm pretty sure. I can take care of some stuff."

Ann looked at him curiously. She didn't know what to do with him. Was he telling the truth, or did he just short circuit himself and forget where he's going?

"Ryuji, what's the REAL purpose of your model?"

Ryuji stood straight and recited something mechanically. "I am a CK500 model. My function is to behave like an adolescent teen. I can be a son, a friend, a brother, and more."

Ryuji slumped again and looked at her. "Pretty cool, right?"

Ann sighed. "Look Ryuji, I don't really need a friend, I need a caretaker. Are you ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE you're at the right destination?"

Ryuji stood stiff all of a sudden. "Based on my scans, I detect that you are lying."

Ann blushed. "I am SO not lying!"

"You so are!"

"I am not!"

"am too!"

"Urgh, why are you arguing with me right now!"

Ryuji stiffened himself again. "I am utilizing my adolescense protocol. I am simulating: puberty-"

"Oh my god, where are your instructions?"

"In my coat pocket."

"Please stuff them up your..." Ann hesitated. She didn't feel right threatening anyone, much less an android.

Much less a dumb android.

"Up my what?" Ryuji finished her sentence.

"Just forget it."

"Got it, you can count on me. Erasing memory bank-"

"No, don't erase your memory bank-"

"Memory erased. Rebooting. Hey, my name's Ryuji. Nice to meet-"

"Oh. My. God."

Ann retreated back into her house, and Ryuji followed. He shut the door and locked it.

"I ain't the most careful android out there, but even I know to close and lock the door. This prevents: unwanted visitors."

"You're an unwanted visitor-"

"Did you request something, mistress?"

Ann cringed. "Don't... don't call me that!"

Ryuji nodded. "Understood, what's your name?"

Ann buried her head into her arms as she hugged her legs on the couch.

"...Ann." She sounded deathly tired and worn out. It has been less than 10 minutes with this thing and she already can't stand him.

"Ann! Nice to meet ya Ann. My name's-"

"Ryuji. You don't need to repeat that all the time."

Ryuji frowned and let himself hang low a bit, as if he was hurt.

"Aw."

Ann was about to tear her hair out. She didn't want to ask him this, but she didn't know how long she could go without knowing the answer.

"Ryuji, are you... are you a bit... defected?"

She winced at that. She was expecting him to feel hurt, although she didn't know how an android could do that, but was surprised to see him smile.

"I'm a prototype. There's a few other teen models, but I'm the newest one!"

Ann sighed and smiled. He was certainly annoying and naive, but he wasn't too bad of a... of an android.

Ann relaxed herself and decided to watch TV. She couldn't really handle this much stress right now.

Ryuji sat himself down, right next to her. Ann pretended not to notice, or care.

"My favorite TV show is sprinting."

Ann had to choke back a laugh. "Sprint... sprinting?"

"My favorite network is Sprint."

Ann tried not to laugh and pretended to be annoyed. "That, was a shit pun."

Ryuji smiled. "Sorry. Would you like to listen to music? My favorite soundtrack is Chariots of Fire."

Ryuji pulled out a speaker out of seemingly nowhere and blasted the iconic movie theme. Ann laughed and looked up at the ceiling. Ryuji smiled.

"I made you laugh."

Ann shrugged. "Maybe it was the music."

Ryuji looked at her. "I am detecting a lie."

"Oh, shut up."

Ryuji studied Ann, and began to imitate her posture. He awkwardly brought his legs up to his body and tried to hug it, but all he did was make some kind of weird circle thing with his arms and lower it so that it was around his legs. The awkwardness of it all made Ann laugh.

"What the hell are you doing?"

Ryuji smiled. "I have a learning system established where I imitate people my age. This knowledge will be recorded down and used for all the other CK500 models."

Ann smirked at the idea of 500 Ryujis rolling themselves into awkward little balls.

She sighed and continued to watch TV with Ryuji, still in a awkward little ball, beside her.

Maybe, just maybe, this might not turn out all that bad.

"My favorite sport is Usain Bolt."

Ann rolled her eyes. It was going to be a long day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay this is already a FAT meme in the persona 5 fandom so I obviously didn't come up with this but this is my take on it. Go check it out on YouTube it's great

(Futaba)  
There! Right There!  
Look at that tan, that tinted skin  
Look at the killer shape he's in  
Look at that slightly stubly chin  
Oh Please he's gay, totally gay

(Ryuji)  
I'm not about to celebrate  
Every trait could indicate the totally straight expatriate.  
This guy's not gay, I say not gay

(Ann)  
GOD Ryuji you’re only saying this because you’re closet-

(All)  
That is the elephant in the room  
Well, is it relevant to assume  
that a man who wears perfume

(Akechi)  
HEY!

(All)  
is automatically matically fay?

(Akechi)  
But look at his quoft and crispy locks (mini O R G A S M)

(Makoto)  
Look at his silk translucent socks

(Ryuji)  
There's the eternal paradox  
Look what we're seeing

(Ann)  
Since WHEN could you speak so-

(Futaba)  
What are we seeing?!

(Ryuji)  
Is he gay?

(Futaba)  
OF COURSE HE’S GAY-

(Ryuji)  
Or European? >;3

(All)  
…  
O H H H H H H  
Gay or European?  
It's hard to guarantee  
Is he gay or european?

(Makoto glances at Akechi SMUGLY)

(Akechi)  
Well, hey don't look at me!

(Haru)  
You see they bring their boys up different  
in those charming foreign ports  
They play peculiar sports

(All)  
In shiny shirts and tiny shorts  
Gay or foreign fella?  
The answer could take weeks  
They will say things like "ciao bella"  
while they kiss you on both cheeks

(Futaba)  
Oh please

(All)  
Gay or European?  
So many shades of gray

(Akechi)  
Depending on the time of day  
The French go either way >;3

(All)  
Is he gay or European?  
or-

(Ann)  
There! Right There!  
Look at that condescending smirk  
Seen it on every guy at work  
That is a metro-hetero jerk  
That guy's not gay, I say no way

(All)  
That is the elephant in the room  
Well is it relevant to presume  
that a hottie in that costume

(Futaba)  
Is automatically, radically

(Ryuji)  
Ironically, cronically

(Haru)  
Scurtinly, curtainly

(Akechi)  
Genetically, netically

(All)  
Gay!  
Officially Gay!  
Officially Gay, Gay, Gay, Gay!

(Yusuke)

Ann, be my nude model.

(Ann)  
Where the hell is your palace?!

(All)

DAMN IT

Gay or European?

(Ryuji)  
So stylish and relaxed

(All)  
Is he gay or European?

(Akechi)  
I think his chest is waxed uuuwuuu

(Haru)  
But they bring their boys up different there  
It's culturally diverse  
It's not a fashion curse

(All)  
If he wears a kilt or bears a purse  
Gay or just exotic?  
I still can't crack the code

(Makoto)  
Yet his accent is hypnotic  
but his shoes are pointy toed

(All)  
H u h.  
Gay or European?  
So many shades of gray

(Sexc Lobster uwu)  
But if he turns out straight  
I'm free at 8 on Saturday

(All)  
Is he gay or European?  
Gay or european?  
Gay or Euro-

(Akechi)  
Wait a minute!  
Give me a chance to crack this guy  
I have an idea I'd like to try

(Morgana)  
The floor is yours...?

(Akechi)  
So Mr. Kitigawa...  
This alleged affair with your... sexc lobster,  
has been going on for...?

(Yusuke)  
2 years

(Akechi)  
And your first name again is...?

(Yusuke)  
Yusuke

(Akechi)  
And your boyfriend's name is...?

(Yusuke)  
Ren

(All)  
GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASPPPP

(Futaba)  
YES SUCK IT RYUJI

(Akechi)  
YES I- wait, REN?!?!?

(Yusuke)

I'm sorry! I misunderstand  
You say boyfriend  
I thought you say best friend  
Ren is my, best friend (HON HON HON!!!)

(Ren)  
You bastard!  
You lying bastard!  
That's it  
I no cover for you, no more!

P E O P L E S  
I have a big announcement  
This man is GAY and European!  
(All) WOAH! (Ren) and neither is disgrace! (All) oh. (Ren) you've got to stop your being  
a completely closet case

No matter what he say  
I swear he never ever ever swing the other way  
You are so gay  
You big parfait!  
You flaming boy in cabaret

(Yusuke)  
I'm straight!

(Ren pulls Yusuke close)

(Ren)  
You were not yesterday.

(Everyone has intense nosebleeds and Futaba’s nose is literally spraying blood)

So if I may, I'm proud to say  
He's gay!

(All)  
And European!

(Ren)  
He's GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

(All)  
And European!

(Ren with Satan’s Voice)  
He's GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

(All)  
And European and Gay!

(Yusuke)  
Fine okay I'm gay!

(All)  
Hooray!

(Yusuke and Ren)  
Fine. Okay. We're gay!

(Akechi sobs in the corner)


End file.
